Dear Life,

Dear male H&M employee (the one on Michigan Ave),

You made my entire week with a few simple words.  As I was checking out a dress in your hand you were putting back, you said, “Oh look, we have it in your size, here’s a 4!!”  I feel like the world stopped at that moment.  You can imagine my elation.  Yeah, I’m not an 8 in H&M, I’m a 4!!!  You totally cut my size in HALF!  I felt like a skinny supermodel that I pretend to hate, but I was secretly excited.  WELL… actually not secretly, since I screeched, “Oh my God, I love you”.  Then gave you a big hug.  I also proceeded to walk around H&M saying very loudly, “I’m a size 4…. size 4’s can wear this, and THAT is what I am.”

I am not in ANY way, shape, or form a size 4.  I want everyone to know that.  And I’m cool with that.  I’m actually borderline cocky about myself.  I think I’m totally fabulous and love every curve of my body.  I adore when my butt looks big (which is why I purchased the adorable sweater dress…. size 8, thank you!).  But what I love, is that even though I am not a size 4…. you THINK I am a size 4.  And isn’t that what REALLY matters???  I now feel like I can continue to chow because I LOOK like a size 4.  Who even cares what size I really am?  NOT ME!

If this was a plan to make me buy something…. brilliant.  I don’t even care if it was cause I was so happy.  I don’t know of any girls who dont like to be told they are thinner (or younger for that matter) than they are.  And you did that for me.  And I love you.  You should totally win best sales associate of the year.  Thanks for making my week and making me feel more fabulous than I already do!  And this after I just chowed on 10 cent wings (really, 10 cents!!!  The Rail in Chicago on Monday nights, check it out, best deal EVER).

Your skinny size 4 friend,

Jessica